I'm continually marveling at how much this relocation to another part of the world has brought me out of my shell and woken up parts of my personality that I was not even aware I possessed. Apparently I am not just a socially uncomfortable introvert content to stay in my room all day while other people go out having a good time, and even though today all I did was join Tim at both Blindern and the pub for dinner and then for the pub quiz, those very simple actions present such a striking departure from my normal mode of behavior.
I'm happy here in a way I was never happy back in Huntsville, and that isn't said as a slight to my home town or anyone who I love dearly back home. I feel like the life I'm sliding into here is one that better reflects where I need to be in terms of my mental well-being and my attitude towards socialization; I don't look for reasons to avoid going out here, because every morning when I wake up and realize where I am, I'm filled with this sense of giddy delight. I'm in Norway, I'm a student in Europe, my closest friends here are, in fact, Europeans, and even after going on three weeks, I am already so attached to this new phase in my life that I just don't want to let it end. I want the next few months here to go on for as long as possible; I want to find a way to stay in Europe once I've graduated, even in England with family if I can manage it; I want to stay close to these marvelous friends I've made in this country--Tim, Elif, Richard, Bastian, even my token American buddies Mike and Ray--I'm so attached and fond of all these people. I love them, even after only knowing them for three weeks.
When I think back on the unhappiness I felt during my first two or three nights here in this country, I can hardly even remember those feelings now, because I am so content. I could do this for years to come, and even though I know I would miss Huntsville, I am more than happy just to relive my memories of it right now.
I don't want to go back. I'm ready for whatever else this new adventure has in store for me.
Let's end the day with some Floyd:
"I'm continually marveling at how much this relocation to another part of the world has brought me out of my shell and woken up parts of my personality that I was not even aware I possessed."
ReplyDeleteI felt -exactly- the same way at Gaidai. Sadly I reverted a bit when I came back, but I do think I regained a bit of the 'just go out and do it'-ness eventually, if not the social savvy. I felt more courage to just go out and do the things I wanted, but I never regained the friend making ability, though the way I explain that is that the people I met studying abroad were all on the same 'mission' as me, and we had so much in common we were bound to get along, and the only other place or time in life I've ever felt that much in common were my Internet friends.
Anyway, I'm so glad you're experiencing that kind of feeling. I loved it at the time, though I also felt a bit awkward telling everyone back home about it, haha. Don't worry about it, because we're all happy you're happy, and I at least know -exactly- what you're feeling.
Well it's odd, I don't really have "friend-making" ability. The university has hosted all sorts of international student events with the intent of introducing us to each other, but most of us are still hanging around with the people we made during our first week here. Tim and I went to "International Coffee Hour" on Friday (which, incidentally, lasts for two hours) and more or less occupied a table to ourselves exceedingly discomforted by all the loud, obnoxious noise. Lots of these events just don't work for us, really.
ReplyDeleteBut the change for me is mainly that... well like I said, I'm not content just to stay at home being reclusive like I am in Huntsville. I want to go out, I want to see things, I want to always be doing something; I don't want to lose that when I come home, and I think the only way to do that is consider a more permanent scene change. Not to Norway, obviously; much as I'm growing to love this part of the world, I don't think I could live here without my group of friends, and they're all going back to Germany and Holland at the end of this adventure.
But we'll see, right? June is still quite a way's off.